受洗見證
◎ Yvonne
我會信主，跟來到同光教會有很大的關聯。早在16歲第一次參加遊行，我便注意到了同光教會，在心中悄悄埋下了種子。去年聖誕節前夕，我注意到了同光耶晚的活動資訊，那時候的我處於人生的大低谷中，一陣衝動就填了報名表。不過當聖誕晚會的日子到來，我的自閉以及種種情緒又再度發作了，所以後來我並沒有去。再隔五個月之後，我的21歲生日到了，當天，我獨自在房裡關上了所有燈，對自己唱著生日快樂歌，唱著唱著，我就哭了，然後做了一件以前從來沒有做過的事──禱告──我說：「上帝啊，求祢帶領我，我願意跟從祢，求祢醫治我，讓我得好睡眠，讓我找到方向，體會人生單純的原味！主啊！求祢拯救我！」禱告完，我感受到頭皮一陣發麻。當天，我也決定為自己做了另一件事，於是我向教會的信箱發了一個訊息，詢問聚會的時間地點。可是，我還是沒有去。終於，就在一個月之後，也就是去年六月，我來到了同光。於是，我便決定要留下來。
說起來，我和同光真的有不解之緣。首先，我是1995年出生的，而那一年，正是同光組成約拿單團契的同一年。1996年5月5日，我滿一歲的當天，同光教會在淡水中學正式創立。當我得知這些巧合的時候，心裡非常詫異，也很感動。我突然領悟到，原來早在我來到了這個世界上的時候，主耶穌就為我預備了一個將來當我遭遇風浪時，可以得安慰，得平安並且認識上帝的地方。其實在同光的一些弟兄姊妹中，我也看見了相似的自己──我們都是如此的纖細敏感，誠實面對自己的情感，更願意反省自己，雖然這樣的我們比較容易感到孤單，但是屬靈的性格卻也幫助我們親近上帝，領受祂的愛。
我相信，真正的緣分是，經歷過一連串的錯過之後，仍能認出彼此。而真正的信仰，是在經歷了一連串的挫折後，仍然能看見主帶來的美麗安排，心存信心，心裡有平安。來到了同光之後，無論是參加小組聚會或禮拜，我都感受到了一股不可思議的平靜。從黃牧的講道與小組的討論中，我開始了解到，「信仰」這件事對我來說已經不再是遙遠的、虛無飄渺的亦或是出自遠在梵諦岡教宗口中的一段經文。反之，信仰就是生活，生活就是信仰。在信仰的過程中，雖然還是會有脆弱與懷疑的時候，但我漸漸明白，上帝是在教導我，他所要帶給我的並不是一件事物最終的形式，而是那「愛與寬容」的本質。
今天，我即將受洗。我滿懷著喜樂與信心，在眾人面前宣誓我與主所立的約，就是要跟從祂，敬拜他，並以耶穌基督的心為心。從此以後，我的舉手投足，都是為了榮耀主，彰顯主。阿們。
How I came to believe in the Lord has a lot to do with coming to Tong-Guang Church. When I first participated in the Pride Parade at 16 , I noticed Tong-Guang Church and that was when the first seeds of faith were quietly planted in my heart. During last year’s Christmas Eve, I came across the Christmas Eve activity information on Tong-Guang’s website. At that time, my life was at it’s lowest point, and on impulse I filled up the registration form for the Christmas party. However, when the time came, my autism and all kinds of emotions resurfaced, so I ended up not going. Five months later, on my 21st birthday, I turned off all the lights and sat alone in my room. And then I sang happy birthday to myself. And as I sang, I cried. Then I did something I had never done before — I prayed. I said, “God, please guide me. I am willing to follow you. Please heal me, let me sleep well, let me find a direction, and be able to experience the simple things in life in an unfiltered way! Lord! Please save me!” After praying, there was a sense of tingling at the back of my head. That same day, I also decided to do another thing for myself, I emailed Tong-Guang Church asking when and where the church service was. However, I still didn’t go. Finally, a month later, that is, last June, I came to Tong-Guang. And then I decided to stay on.
Come to think of it, Tong-Guang and I have a few things in common. First of all, I was born in 1995, the same year when Tong-Guang first formed the Jonah fellowship group. On May 5, 1996, when I was one year old, Tongguang Church was officially founded in Tamsui Middle School. When I learnt about these coincidences, I was very surprised and moved. I suddenly realised that as early as when I came into this world, the Lord Jesus had already prepared a place for me to be comforted, to be safe and to know God in the future when I would encounter storms in life. In fact, among some brothers and sisters here, I can see reflections of myself — our shared delicate and sensitive nature, the way we face our emotions honestly, and are more willing to reflect on ourselves. Although we are more likely to feel lonely in this way, this spiritual personality also helps us to get closer to God and receive His love.
I believe that real fate is this, that even after a series of misses, we can still find and recognize each other. And that real belief is when even after a series of setbacks, you can still see the beautiful plans laid out by the Lord, and have faith and peace in your heart. After coming to Tong-Guang’s group meetings and worship services, I felt an incredible calmness and peace. From Pastor Huang’s sermons to cell group discussions, I began to realise that the matter of “belief” is no longer far away, imaginary or just a bible passage read by the Pope. Conversely, faith is life, and life is faith. In the process of faith, although there will still be times of vulnerability and questioning, I have come to gradually understand that God is teaching me that what He wants to bring me is not the final form of one thing, but the essence of “love and tolerance”.
Today, I am about to be baptised. Filled with joy and faith, I declare in front of all of you my covenant with the Lord, to follow Him, to worship Him, and take the heart of Jesus Christ as my heart. From here onwards, all that I do, I do to honour and glorify the Lord. Amen.
